Kitschmastime with Brian and Ryan: A Holiday Celebration of Absurdity, with Laughter, and of course, Kitsch

Snow at the Kitschmastime pageant, by Brian and Ryan.

Kitschmastime, a “glitter-drenched” celebration with offbeat storytelling, returned with the eclectic duo Brian and Ryan this year. 

Brian Black and Ryan Bulis are a SoCal-based collaborative duo who have been performing since 2004. Their art continues to challenge preconceptions of masculinity, athleticism, and identity, inviting viewers to reevaluate the sanctity of the art institution. The two also work in education. 

The penny-shingled gingerbread house at Bread & Salt.

I booked tickets to their pageant at the Bread & Salt gallery in Barrio Logan last Friday, hosted through The Salty Series. 

I walked into the old bread factory and headed for a room that brimmed with tinsel and plastic bananas. 

Amidst the backdrop of chattering people, the scene was set to the beat of a very loud playlist. The words seemed to be either in another language or in an entirely new one altogether, catchy just the same. 

A table displayed gingerbread houses. Each held surprises. One had pennies for shingles and what appeared to be bottle caps as a pebbled paveway. 

Near the stage, Christmas garlands traveled up poles, interlaced with plastic bananas, snowflake ornaments, and things I can’t name. 

Displays populated the sides of the stage, with dioramas and ornaments for sale. Bowls of faux moss stuck out of a wall like a statement, some containing plastic fruit, one with small antlers, and even one with a small golden castle. 

Clear, pink stocking stuffers with more plastic bananas and various stuffers hung from another wall. 

A very Kitschy stocking stuffer, complete with plastic bananas, of course.

A giant rectangular box of Barilla Spaghetti, taller than a tall person, supposedly 32 ounces, stood on its end, its two giant googly eyes staring back at people. 

The Pageant: An Outlandish (literally) Christmas Story

I turned over the program in my hands as I took my seat. The program was basically a zine: small, handmade, and not mass-produced (maybe even with repurposed materials).

The pageant started with laughter. Brian and Ryan waltzed down the aisle, wearing a cardboard cutout of a bed around their heads. It was the night before Kitschmas, and the two were whisked off to Kitschmasland before they got a chance to sleep. Many puns were cracked at each stop in Kitschmasland, featuring characters from a noodle Queen to gingerbread mutants.

Unfortunately, the protagonists seemed to meet their demise at the hands of the Kitschmas Kraken. 

I won’t spoil the end of the pageant, not just because I don’t remember (being wrapped up in the moment itself), but also because you have to come and watch it yourself, next year. 

A playful bout of snow concluded the evening. Two performers sang a classic Christmas song with gusto, while children from the audience danced in the snow (actually bubbles) swirling from the ceiling.

Sounding Piñatas: An Upcoming Event by The Salty Series at Bread & Salt

Experience the magic with us at another event by The Salty Series at Bread & Salt.

Sounding Piñatas brings the community together again in an upcoming family-friendly, bilingual workshop. The event explores the piñata beyond a festive object — a powerful symbol of community, creativity, and even resistance. 

Teaching artists include Diana Benavidez, a piñata artist from the San Diego/Tijuana region, and Teresa Díaz de Cossio, a sound artist. 

Parting Words

Kitschmas with Brian and Ryan felt like a warm tradition, not a robotic ritual. It was a time of laughter and absurdity. It was small and intimate, not an overcrowded, cash-cow programme. 

If in doubt, follow the laughter, not simply the noise. Maybe you’ll discover an underground artist or space in the process. 

In the meantime, Merry Kitschmas!